Sexy Motherpucker (Audio)

Narrated by Summer Roberts and Tyler Donne

When the family dog trots in with my diaphragm in its mouth - in front of my date, his parents, and his adorable little girl - you would think I'd hit rock bottom.

Wrong.

Let's back this up a sec....

Brendan Daniels is the sexiest man alive. The captain of the Badger's NHL team is also clever, kind, funny, and was my good friend...until we cruised out of the friend zone one weekend with a red-hot fling. Come Monday morning, I wanted to keep riding the Big O train to happy town, but Brendan wanted someone who was "stepmom" material.

AKA, not me, apparently.

The problem? I'm crazy in love with him and his daughter. So when he asks me to be his pretend girlfriend for a long weekend with his former in-laws, I say yes. We're still friends, after all, and friends don't let friends fake it alone.

***

Laura Collins is the last woman I should be thinking about taking in the back seat of my car, in the woods behind my in-laws' house, or in a hotel room where we're sharing one very small, very squeaky bed.

I need a steady, stable influence for my daughter, not a fling with this too wild, too young, too impulsive redhead. So what if she's beautiful and intense and passionate and has the biggest heart I've ever known?

I don't want to fall in love. I really don't. The whole "pretend girlfriend" thing was supposed to solve my problems, buy me a little more time.

But when it comes to Laura?

Hell, maybe I'm just not cut out for faking it.